In my years of living among society (and those years may be dwindling more quickly than I originally expected), I have at least witnessed or been a part of a wide variety of neighbor issues. There have been (and still are) the barking dogs, there have been wild parties, loud cars, and more. Currently, we live in a great little neighborhood. With one glaring exception, we feel that our kids are safe among any of our neighbors. We feel blessed that they are able to walk or ride their bikes to school and enjoy things like sports and church activities with kids from the same school. One problem, however, exists in a way that is getting worse instead of better and I am realizing that I am at a loss as to how I can help things get better.

We live relatively near someone who is either mentally ill or one of the meanest people I have ever personally met. Frankly, I prefer to give them the benefit of the doubt and attribute their behavior to mental illness rather than assume they are just plain nasty. Whatever the reason for this behavior, it is manifested in screaming fits at both children and adults in public or in private, both within this person’s family and without. Except for Michal Kate, every person in my family has been the target of fits of screaming rage- at times laced with profanity.

By nature I can be a bit of a hot head and I have to say, it has been an incredible challenge not to respond in kind. This is especially a temptation after any efforts to discuss things rationally are met either with more screaming or obstinance. I have tried to consider how Christ might respond and I think he would react with gentle conversation, but then again, He could work through illness pretty well to get to the point where conversation was possible. I can’t do that. So what am I left with? Is avoidance my only option? What about the times when this person actually shows up at our door to attack us? I must admit that they have left little room for doubt as to their instability and it is not a stretch to conclude that my family is not safe around them. Therefore, should I call the police when they show up? Is merely trying to steer clear an appropriate response when there are children in this person’s family who are also being harmed by their exposure to such behavior? Don’t tell me just to pray for this person, because we have been- literally for years. And yet, attacks and abuse persist. What, then, is the solution? I am beginning to wonder if one exists. We have tried to use this as a teaching opportunity with the kids. We have told them it is important to love people even when (perhaps especially) when they are being very unlovable or even hateful. We have prayed for this family. We have rebuked our children when they actually verbalize some of the things we are probably all thinking. Beyond that, I am resistant to engage in much of an outreach effort when I am not confident enough of this person’s psyche to trust in our safety. Basically I am at a loss and just getting more and more frustrated.