What's it all about?

I like for my blog to be all over the map. While the last one was pretty serious, I feel this pull drawing me back to the ridiculous. So, speaking of the Hokey-Pokey (previous blog), the old H-P transcends traditional boundaries of class, race and even time. In light of that, how might different people put their "spin" on it? Perhaps...

Shakespeare

O proud left foot, that ventures quick within.
Then soon upon a backward journey lithe.
Anon, once more the gesture, then begin:
Command sinistral pedestal to writhe.
Commence thou then the fervid Hokey-Pokey,
A mad gyration, hips in wanton swirl.
To spin! A wilde release from Heaven's yoke.
Blessed dervish! Surely thou canst go, Girl.
The Hoke, the Poke -- banish now thy doubt.
Verily, I say, 'tis that on which the world doth spin.

A Redneck

Stick in them piggies
Sooooeee!! Come on back, pigs!
Stick yer piggies back over there.
Git 'er done and shake yer bacon!
Commence to Hokeyin' and Pokeyin' and do a donut better 'n' old number 3 (God rest 'im)
That's what I'm talkin' 'bout.

John Kerry

You put your left- no wait, right foot. Well, maybe it is the left. Actually, it may be my perogative to put both feet in it, so to speak. Wait, it couldn't be the right foot. That one was shot off in Vietnam. Want to see one of my Purple Hearts? Actually, I think I may just hire someone to shake it all about. No. Well? Hmm...

Paris Hilton

Umm. Like, which one is my left?

Snoop Dogg

Yo. It's the Hizzle Pizizzle, Know what I'm sayin'? Put in the lizzle fizzle.
("Excuse me Mr. Dogg. Fizzle is a real word."
No shizzle?")

Johnny Cochran

If it's the wrong foot, you must not put!

The Hamburglar

Robble Robble Robble
Robble Robble Robble
Robble Robble Robble
Robble Robble Robble Robble Robble
Robble Robble Robble Robble Robble Robble Robble
Robble Robble!

Floyd the Barber

Oooh. The left foot, ya say?
That's gr- You know my mother used to say I had two left feet.
Did I ever tell you about my mother?
She used to make the best gooseberry pie!
Ha-ha! What if you stuck your foot in a pie?

John Madden

So anyway, he runs around this side over here and BOOM! He sticks his left foot in there. Sure that's good coaching, but if you ask me he just may be better at that than anybody in the NFL. And after that he shakes it all about over here like you can see on the telestrator. And then over here and then BAM!!; again over here!

Mary Katherine Gallagher

Sometimes I like to stick my left foot in and then I- (ssssnifffff) I smell it like this.

Arnold Schwarzenegger

Put your left foot in there and hold... Keep holding girlie man! Feel the burn! Keep holding! Don't stop!!!

Frodo

I can't take another step, Sam. My burden is too great. I must stop. I am going to fail. Why, oh why did I think I could ever see this quest through to it's completion? I cannot even raise my left foot.

Dr. Phil

All I'm sayin' is that your duty to yourself, to your family and to your friends is to stick you left foot in. I don't wanna hear none o' this nonsense or excuses about why you can't or shouldn't. You just need to belly up to the bar and do it. Then once y'all have accomplished that goal that you set for yourself you need to stick that left foot back out there again. The key, then, is to persevere and not give up and to shake it all about. Once you have reached within yourself and found that strength deep inside you that allows you to reach this level of performance, y'all can then reward yourself. That's right. Reward yourself. Y'all have done a great job with the Hokey-Pokey, so turn yourself around. The whole darn deal is just so pivotal.

Austin Powers

Are you ready, baby?! Then stick your left foot in, Baby! Yeah! It's lovely foot, too if you don't mind me offering my two pence worth. Rowr! What were we talking about?

That's the kind of stuff you come up with when you're home sick like I am today. Gotta keep my idiot skills honed in case I ever want to go into politics.

Any others?